Anxiety about money, status and power.
Feel that I have not done as well as my colleagues who stayed with allopathy.
Worse on waking.
02P 00 X NS
Want to be a more spiritual person
and to meditate. Why worry about material things; meditation is the only true
path.
02P 00 X NS
A strong desire to be with friends
and to show my feelings to them.
02P 00 X NS
Making lots of plans and setting
goals.
02P 00 X NS
Wanting to go out and meet with friends
rather than stay at home.
02P 00 X NS
Indifference. My usual habit is to
help, support and control but during the proving I felt why should I help, they
should solve their own problems.
02P 00 X NS
Generally I feel responsibility and
when involved in any group I used to play the role of leader. After the remedy
I did not feel a need to be the leader. I didn't care. Friends felt that I had
become a milder person.
02P 00 X NS
Wanted to listen to music that I
could meditate to.
02P 00 X NS
I felt that my friends weren't cooperating
with me. I felt that I needed their help and they were avoiding me. They didn't
care even though I had helped them in the past.
02P 00 X NS
General unhappiness. Depressed about
my situation. Worse in the morning and when I was alone.
02P 00 X NS
Irritability. A feeling that I have
not done enough with my life. Not enough studying and not earned enough money.
Worse on waking and in the morning. Didn't want to talk to people.
02P 00 X NS
I showed more interest in my older
brother's poultry businesss. I cleaned the hatchery room early in the morning
which I am not usually willing to do.
03P 02 06.00 NS
Feeling more sympathetic towards
people.
04P 01 X NS
Wild sensation, but not all the time.
04P 02 X NS
Fear of mice and rats much increased.
I saw someone's hand out of the corner of my eye and was sure it was a mouse.
04P 02 X NS
Today I am very happy, I meet my
friends and then I went to my sister's house.
05P 13 X NS
At the hospital I was very irritable
with my friends and with visitors. When I got home I got more irritated with
my family members. I had my dinner and went to sleep.
06P 01 X NS
On returning home I was so irritated
that I didn't talk properly to my husband. He said "I don't know why you
get irritated while talking with me. What is happening to you?" I didn't
listen to him and went quickly to sleep. Normally I would get angry but stay
quiet. Since the remedy I have been shouting at him.
06P 02 X NS
Not interested in household chores.
06P 02 X NS
I am more sympathetic to people.
07P 02 X NS
Don't want to talk, desire to be
alone.
07P 03 X NS
Feeling of sympathy. I paid double
what it was worth for a charitable diary. I have never done that before, usually
I neglected that kind of behaviour.
08P 02 X NS
During the proving I have been settled
and able to just watch the world whenever I have been high up on a terrace or
balcony and looking down. When I have been on the ground I have been extremely
restless and had to keep walking, round the Stupa and round the garden at the
clinic.
11P 16 X NS
Have seethed with indignation every
time I have been past the Hyatt. Such an enormous expanse of town given over
to indulging a few visitors. A room costs for a night what many might earn in
several months or a year.
11P 16 X NS
Dream: I was in the jungle with friends.
We encountered Maoist rebels. They killed my friends by cutting their throats
and some of the blood dripped on my clothes. The army arrived and I was scared.
I felt that I hadn't done wrong and so why was I scared. I awoke very depressed
about the dream.
02P 00 X NS
Dream: I was killing a flea but as
I was doing 2 or 3 more fleas were jumping up, I could not kill them all.
03P 02 X NS
Dream: A sheet of aluminium was put
down as a carpet in the hall of my cousin's house.
03P 02 X NS
Dream Someone was offering to sell
me a hotel I asked why and was told it was operating at a loss.
03P 02 X NS
Dream: Of a meeting in an underground
hall, very crowded.
03P 02 X NS
Dream the inner part of one of our
refrigerators had melted.
03P 02 X NS
Dream: I was taken by Maoists to
the North, towards the mountains. Since I had done nothing wrong I was not afraid
of anything.
03P 05 X NS
Dream: Two prestigious people, probably
my school teachers, came to my old house to help make a clay floor.
03P 05 X NS
Dream: Myself and one of my friends
both fell in love with the same girl. She was 16-17 years old, very slim 4 or
4 ½ feet tall and very pleasant.
03P 05 X NS
(When I was nearly ten my father
gave me a pair of shoes for the first time, they were made of tire and cloth.
They were the first shoes I wore.) In my dream I saw that one of those shoes
was broken. I was searching for one of my friends who is a cobbler. I went to
his house late at night and knocked. I woke him up and he answered the door
in sleeping dress.
03P 08 X NS
Dream: My friend and I went to a
house and ate a meal there. At the end of it we were served milk in steel glasses
and it tasted like water. We talked a lot with the house owner who told us his
wife had gone to her maternal house and he was also leaving in a few minutes.
03P 08 X NS
Dream One of my schoolfriends was
driving a car and in it were some children who were lost.
03P 08 X NS
Dream: There were five of us dividing
up a piece of land. One of the people claimed to have captured our land saying
that it belongs to him. I thought the land is somehow missing and the land measurement
team should be brought in to remeasure the whole area so that the missing land
could be found.
03P 13 X NS
Dream: We went to our kitchen and
there was not enough food to eat there.
03P 13 X NS
I had a dream of attending a meditation.
It was a dynamic meditation where you can express every emotion like, laughing,
weeping, hugging, etc.
03P 15 X NS
Dream: I met one of my female friends
in a school, she had gone there for the practical part of her university studies,
she was very happy there.
03P 15 X NS
Dream of a friend who used to call
me a lot and visit. In the dream he said we shouldn't meet again and I felt
very hurt.
04P 02 X NS
Dream: I want to do things but people
distract me. I don't feel angry but convince them not to distract me and let
me get on with my work.
04P 02 X NS
Dream. That I was shopping for shoes.
At the same time I was helping people at a women's workshop and didn't mind
that my shoes were taken or lost.
04P 02 X NS
Dream of a big pot of water and of
washing cloths.
04P 02 X NS
Dream of escape. One of my respective
parents took me to a new house. I supposed it to be a place for a new homoeopathic
project. The house was beautiful with a green carpet. My parents introduced
me to a man and told me I was to stay with him for 24 hours. I was shocked but
I said nothing to my parents and was thinking about how to escape from there.
My mobile phone was not connecting. There were many guards talking to each other.
24 hours is a long time. I finally succeed in escaping from the house and receive
a message from my husband on my mobile. Awoke and my body was numb.
04P 02 X NS
Dream; I see mountains all around
and I am flying above them. I have a very happy feeling. I am telling my nephew
how to make a river and snow. I had this dream again later in the proving.
05P 07 X NS
Dream: many tigers come into my home.
They have run away from the forest. When I see the tigers I am very afraid but
I also have a happy feeling.
05P 11 X NS
Dream of seeing a god and praying
to him.
05P 13 X NS
Dream of a big elephant. The elephant
came into my house and suddenly left. When he saw me he came into the house
with me and I gave him some food.
05P 13 X NS
Dream. I was crossing a long bridge
over a river. The water in the river was green in colour. At the edge of the
bridge was a statue of a god that was red in colour. I looked at it for some
time and went. I woke up and it was already seven in the morning.
06P 02 X NS
Dream. I was again crossing a river
but not by a bridge, instead I swam across it.
06P 03 X NS
Dream about my late grandfather.
He came to bring me with him. He said you must come with me but I don't want
to go with him. He pulled me continuously. Then I awoke very frightened.
07P 04 X NS
Dream: A group of friends are discussing
which belt to chose for their uniform. I saw a heavy metal belt but I realise
that it is a live snake and is moving. I reject that belt and choose a simple
one.
08P 03 X NS
Dream of dancing with my old friends
on the top of a hill. I feel happy because we are sharing love with each other.
08P 05 X NS
Dream of a school celebrating its
golden jubilee.In the ceremony small children with beautiful dresses and trophies
come from the sky and go into a cave. One of my friends explains that the school
was established on that day and that the trophies were won during that period.
I was surprised in the dream because I knew it was not true and I kept quiet.
08P 07 X NS
Dream about work and a homœopathic
project.
08P 10 X NS
Dream that I had written an homœopathy
exam. I thought I must have passed but when the results came I knew that I had
failed. I was very angry and sad. I told everybody that I must have passed.
Then one of my friends shows me the question and I had made a mistake, but I
am surprised because the question was a mathematical one and not related to
homœopathy.
08P 11 X NS
Dream that I was really thirsty.
Drank a litre of water at a time without wasting a drop. In reality I never
take that amount of water at a time. When I woke I was really thirsty, drank
some water and slept again.
08P 13 X NS
Dream of old friends. They were preparing
delicious food for a feast. They pretended they didn't know me and ignored me.
I felt very sad.
09P 02 X NS
My husband told me that I was speaking
in my dreams but the words were not clear. I felt very uneasy.
09P 04 X NS
Dream of my Grandfather who was working
on making wooden windows. When I saw him I was very happy, but when he said
that he was upset with me and my situation and he was working for me, then I
was sad. I felt that I was giving him a lot of trouble. I told him that I was
OK and please don't worry about me but he didn't listen.
09P 04 X NS
Dream of crossing an old wooden bridge,
I crossed it with difficulty. The texture of the water was very dark and the
water was muddy.
09P 05 X NS
Dream about Conrad Black. The overwhelming
arrogance of the man and his complete lack of connection to the real world.
11P 01 X NS
Dream: I met the head of the BBC
and was following him around all day, observing how arrogant and unconcerned
about people he was.
11P 02 X NS
Dream: I was at a photo shoot with
supermodels but it was behind the scenes and everyone was very normal and nice.
11P 02 X NS
Dream last night a group were discussing
violence against women they were saying sometimes women ask for it and I was
absolutely incensed and shouted at them. I was a bit of a lone voice.
11P 05 X NS
Dream: I was a schoolboy and I was
having an affair with one of my teachers. We had had an argument, she was crying
and she wanted me to take a present from her it was in a bag so I couldn't see
what it was. I was adamant that that is not what it was about and love was not
about superficial things.
11P 08 X NS
Dream: I was a schoolboy in a classroom
and we were studying a large drawing in chalk of a human left eye. It was incredibly
detailed and we had to get every detail exactly right. I realised on waking
that this has been a recurrent dream in the proving. I certainly had it the
night before and probably more often. The night before there had been three
copies of the picture and it was about spotting the difference/mistakes between
them.
11P 08 X NS
Dream: I am doing some kind of ballroom
dancing. Perhaps it is for a film. Very classy, Fred Astaire, Ginger Rogers
stuff. Movement is incredibly smooth and flowing.
11P 08 X NS
Dream about an honour killing. My
sister was trying to marry a man but his family did not approve and murdered
them both before they could get married. I was very angry about it both in the
dream and when I woke up.
11P 09 X NS
Dream about cannibalism, of people
eating other people. The most important thing was that this was the most powerful
form of disrespect that could be paid to a person.
11P 11 X NS
Dream I was doing a set of exams
and I knew all the answers but simply didn't have time to write them down. No
one else had this problem and it was made worse by the fact that I ran out of
normal paper and had to use paper that had been pressed into the shape of a
mask of a demon and was very difficult to write on. The exams were very important
and I was devestated that I must have failed them.
11P 14 X NS
Dreams in which religious leaders
figured, especialy the last Archbishop of Canterbury. Also the Dalai Lama and
Superman.
11P 14 X NS
Dream that I was making a documentary
about the head of the BBC and I got him to make a terrible faux-pas about female
newsreaders. Sense of bringing him down for his arrogance. Also of personal
revenge. Terribly excited in the dream to have done it and excited on waking
that the dream was important in that it tied in with the first night. However,
there was arrogance in me in bringing down his arrogance and I felt ashamed
at the delight I took in doing it.
11P 16 X NS
Dizziness and unsteadines on rising
from sitting and getting up from bed in the morning. Lasted till day 10.
02P 02 X NS
Head is very sensitive with a throbbing
pain. It is worse for walking, talking and sunrise but better for sleep, closing
my eyes. I want to sleep but I can't because of the pain.
05P 03 X NS
Severe headache when I went to work.
Bilateral pain, very severe extending from left to right and from right to left.
Sometimes a stitching pain and sometimes a blasting type of pain.
06P 01 X IOS
After going to work I again got a
severe headache. Even so I did my work.
06P 02 X IOS
Head pain first all over then just
on the right side.
09P 01 X NS
Heaviness of head and right eye.
09P 03 X NS
Headache coming from a stiffness
in the neck on the right side and spreading upwards. Worse on turning the head
either way.
11P 13 18.00 NS
I have been feeling a twitching in
the right upper eyelid for the last few days. It is not continuous, it just
lasts a few seconds, on and off.
03P 17 X NS
Burning in the eyes while reading.
04P 00 X NS
Redness of the eyes after bathing.
04P 00 X NS
Pain in the right eye with a very
heavy feeling.
08P 08 X NS
Pain in right eye. Severe, throbbing,
extending to the right side of the head. Worse for light and noise, very sensitive,
I couldn't open the eye. Better for rest, closing eyes and taking food.
09P 01 16.00 NS
While riding in a micro bus I felt
that my right ear was filled with air. Better putting one of my fingers in ear
and shaking it and from swinging my head from side to side. Worse from noise.
Happened again on day 19.
09P 05 X NS
My running nose and drowsiness are
continuing.
03P 15 X NS
The nasal discharge is now mostly
from my left nostril.
03P 18 X NS
Pain in the left joint of my jaws.
Worse opening my mouth while eating.
07P 12 X NS
Since the remedy the apthae in my
mouth have got much worse.
07P 00 X IOS
I am feeling a heaviness in the throat
and at the same time a tingling in the incisors.
03P 01 15.00 NS
Bloody expectoration.
04P 00 X NS
Sharp sticking pains in left side
of my throat, like a very fine, long splinter. Better for a drink of water.
11P 01 20.00 NS
Strange sensation of a bark being
made in my throat. Distinctly felt that there was a barking noise being made
but could not feel any movement in mouth or throat. Whether there was a noise
or not I don't know.
11P 11 07.00 NS
Thirst during physical exertion.
04P 00 X NS
Both appetite and thirst were increased
during the proving.
07P 00 X NS
Thirsty in the night.
11P 05 X NS
Thinking about it I have been eating
a lot of oranges, partly the situation but a bit stronger than that.
11P 16 X NS
Nausea while riding on a bus.
04P 01 X IOS
I felt a sinking feeling in my stomach,
as if raw, which lasted half an hour. This used to happen when I was very hungry.
03P 02 06.00 OS
Cuttting pain in left side of stomach
after dinner.
04P 02 X NS
Twitching in left side of abdomen.
The next day it extended to the heart region.
04P 00 X NS
Formication on the left side of the
abdomen.
04P 00 X NS
Pain in right inguinal region better
by eating.
07P 02 X OS
Feeling of oppression on left side
of chest.
03P 02 20.00 RS
I felt a pressing pain on the left
side of my chest. It moved to the right side and then back to the left.
03P 06 17.00 AS
Pain in the chest, a soreness, daily
alternating sides
04P 00 X NS
Pain in the left side of my chest.
Worse during inspiration and expiration. I rubbed it but it didn't help.
06P 03 16.00 NS
Palpitations of the heart lasting
for half an hour.
02P 00 X NS
Stitching pain in the area of the
heart.
04P 00 X NS
Pain right at the top of my left
shoulder blade. An ache but quite sharp and definitely painful.
11P 02 18.00 NS
Have had some icy coldness in the
left shoulder blade where I had a pain earlier.
11P 08 X NS
Suddenly I felt a piercing pain in
my left elbow. Soon this pain had spread to the whole of my left upper limb.
03P 08 20.00 NS
Caught my bracelet on the
inside of my left wrist drawing blood.
04P 01 X NS
Trembling of right hand when holding
things.
07P 12 X NS
Itching on right arm. Worse at night
and at rest. At first some very itchy vesicles come up. After scratching there
is some watery discharge and slight relief. Further scratching cause slight
bleeding and left a red mark.
08P 09 X NS
Continued itching on right arm, but
more like an rash. Some discharge of white pus. Very rough and slightly hard
to the touch.
08P 10 X NS
Itching on arm continues. Looks like
a rash but on closer observation there are lots of smalleruptions with a discharge
of pus.
08P 13 X NS
I felt a burning in the soles of
both my feet while I was going to bed. There was piercing pain in a small spot,
the ball of the foot, on the sole of my left foot, it lasted a few minutes.
03P 06 21.00 NS
Dull pain in the right knee.
08P 01 X NS
Sudden pain in left thigh while walking.
It remains for a few minutes and then goes. This is repeated 3 or 4 times.
08P 03 20.00 NS
At night I felt that the lower part
of my body became very light and I felt that my legs were flying.
09P 02 X NS
Numbness and tingling in the soles
of my feet.
11P 14 11.00 NS
During the night I had a sharp pain
deep in my right buttock with pains shooting down the outside and the back of
the leg.
11P 24 X NS
Hands and feet feel paralysed. Sensation
of having no hands and no feet when lying in bed.
09P 01 X NS
During the proving I have had a strange
coldness above the wrists and ankles. Strange because hands and feet have not
been cold.
11P 16 X NS
Feeling unsatisfied and not sleeping
till later, midnight instead of my usual ten o'clock and waking at four, usually
sleep till six.
02P 00 X NS
Sleepiness with a desire to close
my eyes.
04P 00 X NS
I don't feel fresh but I don't know
why. I want to close my eyes and I want to rest.
05P 08 X NS
Feel drowsy.
07P 02 X NS
Sleeping on left side. I want to
get up but some external force presses against me and stops me from waking.
I try for a minute and succeed in waking up but after a minute I feel asleep
and the same thing happens. I was slightly afraid that I would not be able to
wake up and had important work to do.
08P 04 X NS
I did not wake fresh. I felt drowsy
and my mind feels heavy.
09P 04 X NS
I have been sleeping on my stomach
since the proving started for many years now I have slept on my side rather
than my stomach.
11P 09 X NS
Woke early and did not go back to
sleep but did not really mind. Happy to lie awake and thinking.
11P 13 05.00 NS
Awoke again at 4 o'clock and did
not go back to sleep but was happy to drowse and muse.
11P 14 04.00 NS
The previous evening myself, my wife
and some friends attended a party given by a friend. It was a really nice party,
unfortunately, I was drunk. Having been drunk I became severely ill. I felt
severe heaviness on my forehead and there was a heaviness in my whole body.
My nose was bloocked and running and I felt heat in spots on different parts
of my body.
03P 12 X NS
Since becoming drunk 3 nights ago,
I have had a continuously running nose, sometimes watery, sometimes thick and
brown. My headache disappeared but I have had a kind of drowsiness. I decided
not to drink alcohol at parties and other occasions, but I could not totally
stop so I decided to drink just very little. I attended two parties and drank
very little and I did not suffer from any headache.
03P 14 X NS
Numbness of the arms and legs and
of the whole body.
04P 02 X IOS
Muscle spasms, especially in fingers
and legs. It happens on simple exertion and comes and goes suddenly.
08P 11 X NS
I have been experiencing much more
numbness than ususal. At any time I put pressure on any part it becomes numb.
It is particularly noticeable in bed at night. On the other hand the usual cramp
and numbness from bending the joints too much is much less noticeable and I
have been bent double in buses for significant periods of time without much
ill effect.
11P 09 X NS
I lost quite a bit of weight during
the proving which was probably due to circumstance of travel, but I did look
at my legs this morning and think that they were positively scrawny. It put
me in mind of the peacock legend. The peacock is said to weep when it looks
at its legs as they are so ugly and the rest of it is so beautiful.
11P 23 X NS